"Adair, who is 30, found herself mired in a Quarterlife Crisis and sought professional help. She says, “I worked with a life coach, and he helped me a lot to realize that I was creating a vicious cycle in my life.... It was a cycle with four different phases, and I’ve followed it basically throughout my life. The steps were: I would get really excited about something, something new something different, something stellar, big. I went off to school totally excited and ready for an awesome experience. Stage two would be like ‘Oh, this is it? This is kind of boring now.’ After one-and-a-half exciting and non-stop years, I realized that I wasn’t excited about being there anymore. Stage three would be ‘What am I doing, why am I choosing to do this?’ In that third stage I would inevitably have some type of breakdown, [which] usually consisted of crying and talking through the feelings of emptiness and boredom with a friend or family member. Then I would have kind of breakthrough in that experience and get myself back up. At that point, I went abroad to Seville, Spain.... Now every time I’m faced with a change or new situation or find myself bored, I ask myself if this is a part of the cycle, or is this genuinely how I’m feeling.”
Will this happen to me when/if I go to graduate school? At first I was really excited about advising, but now after months of studying and thinking about the potential lack of job openings, my head has been filled with worries and doubts, and I have grown less enthusiastic about it. In fact, I fear it.
When/If I enter graduate school, I’m sure I won’t always be super enthusiastic. I’ll probably grow more concerned about getting to class on time, finding parking and getting around campus, and day-to-day things like that. I’ll probably get bored with classes and stressed with studying. Exams and papers will grow increasingly difficult, and I’ll wonder, “Why am I doing this?”
How do I stay motivated? What should I do if I don't get into graduate school? What happens if I spend all this money, time, and effort to get a Master's degree, but there are no jobs available? UT Austin is laying off staff this year...and advisers typically stay at their jobs for a very long time so maybe when I graduate there won't be any vacant positions. Even if the economy picks up sometime next year, I firmly believe that it won't make a full recovery for another few years, and I don't believe there will be any growth. Most companies and public institutions have downsized this year and the year before, and I think they will probably remain at this smaller size. End of recession does NOT equal recovery; actual recovery estimates are grim at best.
This is one of the very few songs I like by this band...but it's a really good song and pretty video.
F.I.R. - Yue Ya Wan (月牙灣) ("Moon Crescent Bay")
The sand of the heavens of Dun Huang Carries with them our memories I look back midway And the Qin passage is boundless and winding
I dreamt that I've passed through the Western Regions Embodying many rugged hills of Shandong Love is like a traveling journal I will seek its riddle
Look at the tears under Moon Crescent Bay That is forgotten above the Silk Road
Whose heart is it? That is alone and left behind Is he still well? How I want to love him Those everlasting tears Solidify just that one sentence Perhaps they can evaporate
Whose love is it? That is stronger than tears Calling softly That can let me melt Every drop of rain water Evolves into my wings Running after the person that I love
Just some random music videos of artists and songs that I've been listening to lately. Not necessarily reflecting on how I'm feeling or anything, just some stuff to share and for people to enjoy.
1. Da Mouth 大嘴巴 - King and Queen 國王皇后 ("Da" means Big, so their name is "Big Mouth"). Diverse group, and Harry the half-korean half-Chinese guy in the group has finally convinced me that yes, Korean boys can be CUTE.
2. 唐禹哲 - 愛我 (Danson Tang - "Ai Wo"). "Ai wo" means "Love Me". I'm not crazy about the video, but I love love this song, mostly because I love Danson's voice. It helps a lot that Danson is attractive.
3. "Utakata" by Amano Tsukiko.
4. Cover of "If I Ain't Got You" by Alicia Keys by Korean singer (who also sings Jpop) Younha
5. "Dai Wo Zou" ("Take Me Away") by Rainie Yang. Haha sorry, the video doesn't start until about 0:33 in
Everyday my life's in shambles Since you took your love away. I got nothing left to gamble I've thrown it all away
Now and then I'm suicidal Flirting with a new temptation Happiness inside a bottle Is what I need today
Oh my lover's gone away, gone to Istanbul Light as a feather I lie in my bed and flip through TV channels Eating Godiva I'm smoking my days away reading old E-mails In my old pajamas What a day, me muero, muero, muero
Loneliness makes it's arrival The passion starts to settle in Should I go Winona Rider And do some crazy things
Now and then I'm suicidal Flirting with a new temptation Overdose overreaction Call it what you may
Oh my lover's gone away, gone to Istanbul Light as a feather I lie in my bed and flip through TV channels Eating Godiva I'm smoking my days away reading old E-mails In my old pajamas What a day, me muero, muero, muero
*Note: "Me muero" roughly translates as "I die" in Spanish
