Yale staff member. Stanford alum. Speech Pathologist. Law school student. Medical school student. Investment banker. Chemical engineering PhD student.

Then there is me: absolutely unspectacular.

I know that the real goal in this life on Earth is to serve God in whatever you do, not to have a kickass title or career, but I still get discouraged. I'm so ordinary, I'm not ambitious, I'm not smart or confident (the last one should be obvious!) I have an idea of what I would like to do....but I don't know if I will be able to go through what it takes to get there. I often feel like my entire college career was wasted because I'm just stuck in a rut instead of using that time to get somewhere. I guess I hadn't figured out what I had wanted to do until now, so there wasn't much I could have done in college anyway. Everything in retrospect becomes "Oh, I should have done that!" or, "Why didn't I do that?"

I guess even if I had a fancy title, it would be very lonely. As my sister told me, "Joanne, it's lonely at the top. Do you have what it takes to fire someone? To take on responsibility for people's lives?" But I guess she was specifically speaking about becoming a CEO or something. Would I be happier to work ridiculous hours and often come home unappreciated, just so I can have a fancy title?

Ah, the Twenty-something crisis....I should dig up that book I bought on it.